Of Dæmons and Demons
by Gun toten Girly
Summary: "Dæmons are conduits of the soul, or so they say." Essentially a oneshot dump of characters and their relationships with dæmons. Scenarios will be both canon and AU. Kind-of-but-not-really a His Dark Materials crossover. I just took the concept of dæmons. Mostly writing exercises.
1. Kikyo's Resurrection: Introspection 1

Guess who's back and better than ever?

Not me. What's good. I've recently read stories that have fucked me up so I wanted to contribute to the Inuyasha fandom. There'll be more, I love this concept so much.

First oneshot: the night after Kikyo's resurrection.

The story behind Todd's non-Japanese name will come out, no worries. I'm sure someone can guess what it is. A painful amount of research went into it.

* * *

She couldn't feel him. It was so strange to feel his warmth and not hers reflected back. To feel his coat, so soft and comforting, and not his pleasure or happiness at being held. His wet nose was snuggled against her collarbone, his little paws tightly gripping her shirt, and his heartbeat was fluttery against her hand on his back. But she couldn't feel anything else; couldn't catch the whiff of her own scent, couldn't feel the faint texture of her shirt rasping against her palms, couldn't feel the heaviness in every heartbeat…

There was a sense of shallowness about her, now, too. Words could hardly describe what it felt like, how her essence had been scooped out and shattered. To feel it stuffed into something hard, to _feel_ Todd under her skin instead of hers under his (as it should be, almost like it is now but it's not the _same_ … not anymore), to hear his pained gasps as they melded together… to see, through eyes that felt less like _eyes_ and more like glass (she keeps trying to forget the sound Kikyo's eyelids made as they rolled over her stone eyeballs).

It was impossible to describe how _broken_ she feels now that she and Todd are separated. When she forced control back to her body, when she wrestled her soul away from the hollow _pot_ that had cursed and screamed at her new friend, why the sensation of Todd breaking away had been relieving, like soothing gel on a sunburn… she knew she could never explain it to anybody. But then the distance had grown greater, had torn and stretched and she'd felt a lurch in her heart when their bond had snapped.

Her fingers curled in his fur. Todd gripped her arms tighter.

She'd never forget his screech. It had raised every hair on her body, had mirrored the pain perfectly in her mind, and she knew it would be a very long time before she stopped crying without it echoing in her ears.

"What are you thinking?" Came a small, horrified whisper in her arms.

Oh, that's right. They couldn't think together anymore. Talking had to be a thing.

"That I miss you," Kagome immediately said, curling her body around her little dæmon, "and that I'm sorry."

"For what?"

Kagome felt the sides of her mouth pull down as she fought her sobs. It took longer for her to respond, and halfway through her battle she felt Todd begin to pet her.

"For everything." She managed.

A tiny purr began to trill against her chest. "You couldn't control it. Only one person could, and he failed."

Kagome frowned. "That's not fair. You can't blame him, either."

The hair under her palm began to stiffen as Todd raised his hackles. "I can and I will. He did this. Why did he say her name? Why does he care so much?" Todd's voice, already a hoarse thing, trailed off as his anger rose.

Kagome stared into the dying fire, suddenly hyper aware of the silence in old Kaede's hut. She hoped Inuyasha, wherever he was, couldn't hear them. A small part of her, one she hoped was a remnant of her and Todd's bond, fervently wished he could.

"I don't know," she eventually said. "But it's not fair. He didn't know this would happen."

Todd didn't respond for the rest of the night, trying to ignore the guilt that ate at him. He'd told her that the half-demon had been bad news from the start – that he didn't like his attitude or his dæmon's, that she deserved better than a mean boy with a chip on his shoulder a mile wide, whose dæmon still growled at her if she moved too fast.

And yet he could feel his own attachment to the lonely, hurting boy. One he knew that, come morning, would be waiting for them on the porch. He thought of Inuyasha's face blushing every time Kagome made him food (which was often), and he thought of Cho's wagging tail whenever he'd make a particularly funny joke. He remembered his deep thoughts just days previous, wondering at how such an abused soul could be any sort of kind. He remembered pale, spindly legs standing over him, loud, vicious snarls vibrating through the air, and Kagome's relief from across the meadow as Inuyasha fought his brother Sesshomaru.

No, it wasn't fair. But Todd was still angry. He knew, with the sort of deep wisdom he didn't know he possessed, that Kagome would always be second to a dead woman.

For now, though, he clung to Kagome as tight as he could, and ignored the sound of bare feet thumping on the wooden porch outside.


	2. Love: Introspection 2

Inuyasha knew that Cho was an African Wild Dog because Kagome told him.

She said they were vicious and feared, but known for their loyalty. "They'll defend their family against anything — even lions."

Inuyasha'd never seen a lion before but Kagome said they were like tigers with thick furry scarves… or manes, yes, that was the right word, but not like a horse's. "Fearsome," she'd said, "the king of the jungle. The only big cat that lives in a pack."

His eyes unfocused as he stared at Cho's pale fur. It was strange, that the proof of his bastard blood was beautiful on his dæmon. On him, his silver hair was hideous and a smear on humanity. On her, it was everything he heard Kagome say about him. A terrifying, yet wild warrior. Her protector. Guardian. He imagined every "thank you" she'd ever uttered glittering in his dæmon's fur. One time she called him the physical embodiment of true love.

If only true love hadn't gotten his father killed. If only true love had protected his mother.

True love shouldn't exist. It got people killed.

And yet… he glanced at Kagome and Todd, their little bodies breathing gently under her sleeping-cocoon. Her face was cast in the brilliant firelight, and he could see a hint of Todd's black ear against her chin. Some moments, the light played her features to be gaunt, its shadows sucking the fat from her cheeks and gouging the strength behind her eyes. He imagined burying her as he did his mother, whose dead face looked similar, and hitched a deep breath. Other moments the light curved around the plump swell of her face and it eased his raised hackles.

True love was what made him snarl. It ignited the anger and passion and desperation he'd never felt before meeting Kagome. It liberated in him the cheer and joy and loyalty he'd been forbidden to feel. It's what made his fingers curl and throat purr and heart beat hotter and faster in his chest and eyes close and warmth spread through his body as her fingers gently pulled on his ears or combed through his hair and the pleasurable choir that rose in his gut and in his chest when Cho curled around Todd and Todd wedged himself in between her legs and tucked himself under her chin and —

No. That would never happen. Inuyasha tucked that particular daydream far back into his mind.

Kagome said African Wild Dog. Kagome said he was True Love's Proof. Kagome said his name like a prayer and always always asked for permission to touch him. She yelled and glared and challenged his anger with her own. She cared if he was fed or hurt or sad or angry and he could always catch Todd's glittering black stare before it darted away.

Kagome knew him better than he knew himself. Kagome knew Cho was an African Wild Dog before he did — said her giant ears were to help with hunting (not stupid-looking), said white, red-eyed animals were rare (not disgusting), and said that Cho represented loyalty and ferocity and beauty (not filth).

He turned to look back at his dæmon. The proof (to him, as it secretly always had been) that there was beauty in love. Burgundy eyes bored into his.

'They are ours,' he heard in his blood. Inuyasha's gaze never wavered as he answered his soul.

'Yes.'


End file.
